Sorry I don't have the time; let's not continue

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If a guy says he has not the time for you, forget about him.

Time is the most previous commodity each of us has. Every one of us has only 24 hours a day. When a guy tells you he's busy with his work and has no time for you, it's plain bullshit.

Because I have seen the true real man myself.

No matter how busy a man is, no matter how many projects he has on hand at work, no matter how high his position in an organisation, even if he is a C-level executive, if he cares enough for his wife and children, he will find ways and means to spend them with them, simply because he loves them so much.

When a guy tells you he's busy with his work, what you should know is he's telling you you are not his priority. If you are already in a relationship with him, let him know that he should be spending time with you. If he's reluctant, it means he's not that into you and it's better you let him go.

If you only starting to get to know a guy, let me go and don't continue further with him because there won't be much progress. He is only willing to spend time to chat with you online, not on a face-to-face basis. I don't think you want a virtual boyfriend, do you?

I was quite angry with this guy because he was not honest. He was not interested in me yet he just gave me the excuse of his being too busy with his projects and had no time to develop a relationship with me. I told him he should just told me directly he was not interested in me. There's not need to beat about the bush and say "I don't have time", "we are different", or "we're not meant to be". If you encounter this kind of guy, better leave him as quickly as possible because they are not forthcoming with what they say to you.

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Thanks Shrek for the hope you give

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Synopsis of Shrek can be found at Wikipedia here.

Many Disney princesses are beauty themselves and I think this helps them a lot in finding their princes in life. This is a fairy tale I couldn't live with.

I love Shrek much more than those Disney animations as it is closer to the reality I'm living in. I'm not pretty and I said this a thousand times in this blog. I received many so-called "constructive criticism" to go under the knife to change how I look. But Shrek's story reminds us that with inner beauty, we can find love as well and that love is truer than love based on looks. It also reminds her we can always find someone compatible. We don't always have to fix our outer beauty.

Princess Fiona and Lord Farquaad could get married but Fiona would only be wanted by the lord because of her looks and his desire for power. There was no love to talk about. He also didn't risk his life to rescue Fiona from the fiery dragon. Fiona won't be happy and she would be better staying alone locked up in the tower guarded by the dragon. How could she have happiness when the Lord didn't have the the courage to act like a man to save her from danger?

However, Shrek looked at Fiona in a different way. He truly loved her for who she was and thought she was the most beautiful and wonderful woman in his life. He was also the one who dealt with the dragon and released Fiona from her imprisonment, so he truly deserved Fiona. The intangible qualities of two people coming together, for example, the comfort, chemistry and the bond of two persons, are more important than comparing cold hard data like wealth, power and beauty.

However, the solitary life of Shrek also means that this kind of man is harder to find. So if you want to find him faster, you got to work hard and take the initiative to seek him out through as many dating channels as possible.

I wrote about different dating channels in an older post, Here's the link.

Good luck!

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Fairy tale is for everyone but me

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In Disney's fairy tale animations, princesses, no matter how dire how situations might be, they would always meet a guy richer and in a better position in life who lifted their status in life overnight.

Look at Cinderella and Belle in Beauty and the Beast.

I thought...well...fairy tales are just what they are. Fairy tales. Idealistic stories that in real life couldn't happen.

Little did I know how wrong I was!

I couldn't believe fairy tales were happening to people all around me.

In my ex-company, my supervisor was able to live in a landed property because it was a gift given to One him by his father-in-law!

In one personal development class that I went to, a lady shared with us a group of ladies that the first day she went out with her then-boyfriend she knew that he was the one and they married in a week!

A third example occurred on my cousin. For years, she told everyone she hated marriage and would never see herself marrying. However, in her late twenties, she suddenly changed her mind. She didn't have to go to any blind-dating session.  She even have a strict criteria that the guy must be a Singaporean Chinese, not a Caucasian (in Singapore colloquial term, it is ang-moh). Her eldest brother found her a boyfriend that met her criteria. They dated for a year and the guy proposed. The guy was rich as he drove his car and his parents lived in a landed property in an expensive estate in Singapore. He spoke mainly English and very little Chinese. In Singapore, it meant that he came from a very privileged family background as it was the people who could speak English very well advanced well ahead of everyone else.

I was always told if you don't want something, you wouldn't have it. Even if you suddenly want something, you have to have patience and pray hard and have faith. But no. My cousin didn't have to go through the trial of patience and faith.

I have to be criticised by many people around me for my looks, my busy work and my requirements. Well, I have to have certain criteria right. I can't possibly pick up any man from the streets right? This concerns my lifetime happiness and so, shouldn't I be more choosy? Also, everyone is busy these days? Why was I accused of being a busy bee when many times it was the guys who were busy with their career? My cousin wasn't criticised for her looks even when her face was full of acne. She wasn't criticised when she didn't want to get married. But I have to go through all of those tribulations.

I have sincerely pray for God to please bestow me a good boyfriend. I have worked on improving myself, including how I look, my skincare routine, what I wear, how I communicate, and in my professional knowledge. I have sought and implemented improvements in many areas of my life so that I could encounter and attract better guys. But no matter how many temples I went to, how many Tarot card readings I have, how many numerology sessions I have, my love life is simply just a gray tunnel. It was a tunnel started in year 2006 when I suddenly realised I would like to have a man in my life and up till last year. It was a total of 10 years. A decade of searching, heartbreaks, falling and crawling up.

I finally have a new boyfriend. He was a nice guy with a good character but was poor like me. But we both have the same dream of striking rich with our hard work and vision. I hope together we can have a promising future. We have a long way to go. I guess for me, I have to create my own fairy tale instead of getting my fortune through marriage with a rich guy. But at least, I'm happy that I have a guy now who loves me truly for who I am and deeply concerns about my affairs.

To single women who are still seeking love, I hope you find your fairy tale soon like me after a decade of searching. I hope your search will be faster than mine. Good luck this year!

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